Should Storm

Guiding Question:
Why am I always telling myself what I should be doing?

Distilled Thought

You wake up with a list.
Even if you didn’t write one.
A silent roll call of all the things
you should be doing
by now,
for them,
for yourself,
for the version of you that never rests.

The storm doesn’t scream.
It lectures.
Quietly. Persistently.
“You should have known better.”
“You should be further along.”
“You shouldn’t need so much rest.”

But should is not a compass.
It’s a cage.

And you’re allowed to ask:
Whose voice is that?

Cognitive Pause

“Should” thoughts often come disguised as responsibility —
but they can carry hidden shame.

When “should” becomes constant background noise,
it may mean you’ve internalized someone else’s expectations.

This isn’t failure.
It’s a signal.
A place to pause,
to soften self-policing into self-listening.

Unraveling Prompts

• What’s one “should” I carry that no longer feels true?

• Where did I first learn that rest must be earned?

• How would I move through today if I trusted my own pace?

Mental Repatterning

Try a “Could, Not Should” Reframe
When you hear a “should,” gently reword it to “could” —
then add “if I choose to.”

Example:
“I should respond to that message” →
“I could respond if I choose to — or I could pause and return when I’m more grounded.”

This softens obligation into agency.

Closing Shift

You are not lazy. You are not behind.
You’re just tired of being ruled by rules that were never yours.

What part of you already knows there’s another way?